I just thought that I would give you the playlist that I was listening to while I threw the site together. 3 Doors Down - Duck and Run Truth Hurts & Rakim - Addictive (so contagious) Barenaked Ladies - Pinch Me Control - Puddle Of Mudd Creed - What If DMX - We Right Here Dirty Godsmack - Whatever Ice Cube- Put your ass into it Jimmy Eat World - The Middle Khia - My Neck, My Back Linkin Park - In The End Ludacris feat. Shawna - What's Your Fantasy Mighty Mighty Bosstones - The Impression That I Get Missy feat Ludacris & Trina - One Minute Man Nappy Roots - Aww Naw Nerd - Lapdance Linkin Park - It's Going Down (Feat Mike Shinoda)

Unknown posted this Fucked up thought @ 1:38 PM est

Wow, this site is quite something. This girl has also had it really rough, she could have been killed by her ex boyfriend. I wondered at first if this was one of those fiction sites where people pretend that it's real, but really it's just a site to make people think. I still have that in the back of my mind, but I'm not going to question it, I'm going to take it at face value. Please go to that site and read her whole story, even the journal.

Unknown posted this Fucked up thought @ 2:11 PM est

Holy shit, this game is going to be the fucking bomb! I can't wait for this to come out in the beginning of 2002. If you love The Sims, then you're going to really fucking dig this game! I have to get a good job before then, just so I can pay for this game and the online fee every month. I don't know what it is with me wanting to play different online games! Maybe I'll be Nexus Tk to play until this other game comes out. I definately want The Sims Online when it comes out, though.

Unknown posted this Fucked up thought @ 3:05 PM est

I was just going over the chat logs for the site and I was wondering if I have a better chat room, would y'all come and chat at it more often? I was thinking about breaking down and getting a shitty commercial supported one, even though I hate that type of shit. It would be better than the cgi chat room, that's for sure. Also, I should be setting up my grey matter soon- well, it's already setup, I just have to switch over to it and everything. Then y'all will be able to leave comments again. I think that I'll do that this weekend if I get a chance, or definately Monday.

Unknown posted this Fucked up thought @ 2:30 PM est

You know how most people have wishlists on their page from Amazon dot com? The only thing that I want right now, and my birthday is coming up, is a 6 month subscription to this game- which is $44.95. I didn't ever think that those wish lists worked, but I really would appreciate it if someone would help me out on this. My birthday is August 5, anyway. My trial on that game just ran out, so I need to get a subscription pretty fast.

There's a few things that I need to do to this page, but I feel that I don't ever have the time. Ugh, I think I need to install cute ftp again. I hate reformatting the computer. Otherwise, I'm going to probably sit here and do nothing until James gets home. He was a little nicer yesterday- go figure.

Unknown posted this Fucked up thought @ 1:38 PM est

Eeek, what a gawd aweful time in the morning. I've been up for about a half hour, actually. I woke up with James, since I knew that I wouldn't be able to wake up on my own to go to my interview. The result being that I have 4 hours to kill before I actually have to be there. That's alright, it'll take me an hour to get ready and a half hour to get there, so it's all good. I'm a bit nervous about it, but I'm trying not to think about it too hard.

James was a fucking twink yesterday and the day before last, so I don't even know why I thought that his nice streak would last. It's alright, he better straighten up soon, especially if I don't get this job. I'd be half tempted to go home if I don't get this job... home to Ohio. I was just getting ready to play a really cool game, which I have to buy as soon as I get the money. I wish it didn't cost to play it online, but it's well worth the money. Y'all should check it out and tell me what you think.

So, does anyone have a copy of the final version of Windows XP for me? Let me know if you do, cause I really need it. I would really like an already cracked version, if possible. My computer is all toe up, so I need to get this shit together and delete all the partitions and put one os on it. I always have a way of fucking my computer up, wheee. I got some new hostees. I'll put them up on my perm links very soon, as soon as I get the time.

Unknown posted this Fucked up thought @ 7:17 AM est

I was trying to give the new netscape browser a chance, but my site looks like shit in it. Otherwise, the browser is alright, even though I noticed problems with it right away. I can't do the right click and open link in new window thing, for some reason. Maybe that's a combination of my computer problems and netscape just sucking. I haven't started using the email client yet, and I don't know if I'm going to. I thought that it would be fun to try it out, but the more I use it, the more problems I see that it has.

Unknown posted this Fucked up thought @ 5:53 PM est

Not much been going on here lately, just chillin. I've been playing dominoes at yahoo games and am getting ready to start playing spades. James is doing alright, we're been getting through everything without too much trouble. I have to go for my interview the day after tomorrow, so I'm pretty exicted about that. 2 jobs, 18 applicants- I really hope I get it, since I probably have more experience than the others. I've been thinking about what I should say, and I think I've pretty much got it.

Also, I have a name for aol instant messenger that I want to give away. This is one for Nsync fans- LanceGotzBootay. If you want that name, email me, and I'll make up a new password for you and you can have the name. Then you can change the password or do whatever with it. I just want someone to have it that will use it. I have a couple other names to give away, but I'm not going to do that just yet. I better get out of here for now, seeya!

Unknown posted this Fucked up thought @ 2:48 PM est

Also, I almost forgot- I want to blog at a site kinda like this, that gets more hits. I want it to be a blog site that's pervereted, uncensored, and trash talks anything. I like the site I just mentioned, but it don't seem to get enough hits. I don't want to blog and blah blah about everything if there isn't anyone that is going to read it. I like to blog about my life on this page, so I don't want to get into everything else here, too. Let me know if you or someone you know runs a blog that you would like for me to blog for. I would like a decently travelled blog, at least 300 hits a day.

Unknown posted this Fucked up thought @ 10:42 PM est

Sorry I haven't written for a couple of days. James and I have been very busy. He briefly mentioned the other day that he thought that I was using him for his money. Psssssh, I could find someone nicer than him that would actually spend money on me! He doesn't spend shit on me, except when we go out to dinner, and that's the way it should be anyway. We got over that, anyway. We had a big fight last night and I about took him to the police. I decided not to, since I knew that he would lose his job. Then we decided after that, that we would try to make a go at getting along together.

He's been nice all day today, not even called me a name. I told him that if he even called me a name, that was it. He don't have much money right now because of the bills, so I understand the cheapness. He was mad cause I haven't got a job yet. This is a small town and it's not like I can go up to a business and say "You're giving me a job now, dammit!". I explained all of that carefully to him. That and the fact that I have an interview to a good paying job on Thursday. I didn't think that I would be able to take his shit long enough to stay for that interview, but he has changed. It's a rare day that he don't even call me one name.

Maybe that was the motivation that he needed to be good? I was going to go to the police because he pulled me up out of a chair by my arm, and since he pulled too hard, he flung me up and into the kitchen door. It made my hand go numb for a few minutes and also made my elbow and shoulder hurt a little. Later on, he was upset that he accidentally did that. He said that he must have misjudged his strength when he pulled me out of the chair. Either way, he's nice as anyone could be right now. We made a pact to get along, it was cool. You'll be the first to know when it gets broken, of coarse.

Looks like I'll be on The freakiest wink, which is a webcam survivor like thing where to the people vote on the funny faces that you make, which convey emotions. That starts on the 20th, so I need to get my webcam hooked up by then and get this damn computer straightened up. I've been playing dominos on yahoo games lately, I think that's going to be my new habit. I stayed up tonight, since James has to go to bed early since he has to be at work at ass o'clock in the morning. I'm going to play some dominos, read a book, and do shit on here. I have plenty of shit to do since I reformated some shit on here. Damn computer tripped out on me.

I also need to maybe do some email later on when I'm really bored. I lost all the email I had, so there's only 20 in my email box that I haven't answered. I answered the rest of them in the past couple of days, these ones I just needed time to write back- more time than I've had recently. Well, I better get out of here for now. Maybe I'll write more later.

Unknown posted this Fucked up thought @ 10:13 PM est

Jebus H Cripes, it's fucking hot here. And there goes the ice cream truck... I haven't seen one of those in years. James did a complete 180 today, he's acting so nice. He hasn't said one mean thing all day, it's amazing. It's like he almost knows that I would leave him if he keeps his shit up. We're going to have lots of fun on Saturday, since he's off. We're going to go to a beach and then out to eat and a movie. I sure hope that "nice James" stays around for a while.

I got called about the job today and I have to go to an interview on the 21st. There's 18 applicants for 2 jobs, so I really have to do good at this interview. I'm going to write down everything that I need to say, that way I don't forget anything. It's much easier to get a job here in corrections than it was in Ohio. I don't have to take a physical or psychological test here, like I did there. I'm pretty sure I can get this job, since I know exactly what they want to hear. Damn, I have to get out of the house, it's just too fucking hot in here.

Unknown posted this Fucked up thought @ 8:01 PM est

I really fucked up my computer on my side. Thankfully, I have a dual boot system, so I can still access everything from the windows 2000 side. Looks like I'm going to have to give up on windows xp until I get a better beta version of it or the final. One of my friends sent me windows me a while back, so I think I'm going to spend the rest of the night installing that and trying to get all the things back that I used to have. The computer crashes right after I start it up and restarts itself. I don't even have time to do anything before it just restarts itself. The bummer is that I can't access and move all my files from this side, cause I made it so that James couldn't dig into my files and see what they were while he was on this side.

Speaking of James, he did something that really pissed me off, but I promised him that if he was nice to me that I wouldn't put it on here. Believe me, if he pisses me off or if we break up, y'all will be the first to know about the treacherous thing that he did. Well, it wasn't that bad, but let's just say that I don't want people looking at that type of smut on my computer. He only did it on three different days, though. (when he was mad at me, of coarse) I'm sure y'all can figure out what I'm talking about, even though I'm not telling you what it is. I found some shit in my browser cache, we'll leave it at that.

Otherwise, I'm giving him some time to settle his ass down with insulting me before I do something irrational. He's just moody as hell, that's about it. He's sweet as pie one minute and then he's all pissed off the next minute. He was a bitch last night and then this morning he was the sweetest guy in the world. Then he went back to being an asshole for a few hours and then right before he went to work, he even said he loved me and kissed me goodbye. How fucking psychotic is that? One minute he calls me an ugly slut and then the next minute he says that he loves me and is kissing me.

Well, I'm going to get out of here for now, since I know it's going to take me forever to get all the shit back on this computer that I had. I haven't been able to check my email today and it looks like that I'll probably lose the email that I already had. I'll also have to reinstall my messengers and shit, so if you want to talk to me on there, check back in a few hours. I'm out for now...

Unknown posted this Fucked up thought @ 9:30 PM est

James is driving me up the wall and has absolutely no respect. He told me that he wanted me to do the dishes and I told him that I would, but not right when he asked me. He got mad cause he thinks that I have to do it right when he asks me to. I told him that I like to do things on my own time scale and that I would do it later when I'm really bored. I'm starting to think that he's never going to change his colors. I thought that he could change, but I really don't know. The only problem is that he was really nice last night and he's an ass today. I still say that he's got a Dr. Jeckyll / Mr. Hyde thing going on. Other people think that he's really nice and sweet, but they don't know him like I do.

Anyway, I was downtown waiting for Adrian, but something must have come up, cause he wasn't there. I just paged him, but no answer yet. I might just go downtown and sit around, since it's so hot in this house and I don't feel too good, since James has been treating me badly. I wonder why people like James are the way that they are? I've never met anyone that can be so cold to someone that they love... but the next minute, they're the sweetest thing on earth. Maybe he has a psychological problem or something... I don't know.

Unknown posted this Fucked up thought @ 9:21 PM est

I went downtown and talked to my new friend, Adrian. He's one of the coolest people that anyone could ever meet, for real. He's also a music producer with his own little label that is pretty big locally. Someone even pulled up beside us in their car and asked him about getting a cd from him, it was unreal. Anyway, I'm going to his studio tomorrow and recording some shit, just to see if I can sing and everything. I think I can sing, but I'm not really sure. So, if I can sing good enough, we're going to work on some of our own songs using my poems and stuff. After that, he knows some distributors, and we're going to release it into the local area, including a big city that is a little ways from here.

I'm pumped, since y'all know that I've always wanted to be famous and a singer and everything. On top of that, he's such a cool guy just to be friends with. I guess it was just luck that he happened to be into the music business. Otherwise, I'm not doing shit. I was just hanging around with him today and went to see about the job I'm trying to get. I need to email the woman tonight and she'll probably call me tomorrow, since she wasn't in by the time I got there, since she left early for the day. I don't think I'll have time to work on the webpage tonight, since I was busy doing other shit tonight. I'm on my way from being an internet superstar to being a real star. Talk to you later...

Unknown posted this Fucked up thought @ 12:45 AM est

I was just getting ready to go downtown, since James just left for work. I really need to get out of the house and get some fresh air, since James was driving me up the fucking wall yesterday. He's so moody, I'd swear that he's ragging or something. Anyway, I just wanted to let y'all know that the top sites has been changed a little bit and I plan on making it better tonight if I have the time. Someone sent me a nice button for it, too. They'll be getting good credit for that whenever I figure out what their url was, I guess I could look in my stats for it.

So yeah, I'm going to promote it and make it prettier tonight. Add some wording to it and perhaps get everyone in it so far to help promote it so they get hits. I know these things work really well, since I get a ton of hits from Stile's top sites. I get decent hits a day here, so that means that all kinds of people will see the top sites thing whenever they come here, since I'll add it to my main menu tonight. I'll do all that shit after I get done playing all my new anime games tonight, I love those things. Princess maker 2 and games like that just plain out fucking rule. Talk to y'all later.

Unknown posted this Fucked up thought @ 7:51 PM est